unique jokes

unique walking the dog

Funny unique jokes

 

A bear and a rabbit are walking in the forest when they come across an antique oil lamp. They rub it and *poof!* out pops a genie. He says, "you each have three wishes so use them wisely."

Bear, wish 1: I wish I was the only male bear in the forest [so that all of the female bears will like him]

Rabbit, wish 1: I wish I had a snazzy motorcycle helmet

Bear, wish 2: I wish I was the only male bear in the country

Rabbit, wish 2: I wish I had a motorcycle that matches my helmet

Bear, wish 3: Hmmm, ooh i know! I wish I was the only male bear in the...WORLD!

Rabbit, wish 3: And I wish that the bear was gay!

 

I took a real estate client to a handyman special. The place was great, and we couldn’t understand why it was so cheap, until we turned on the water main and water gushed from the ceiling. Dripping wet, my client put a positive spin on the showing: "Nice house," he said. "It’s even self-cleaning."

 

Question: Why are ghosts bad liars?

Answer: Because you can see right through them

 

Q. How do you catch a unique rabbit?

A. Unique up on it.

Q. How do you catch a tame rabbit?

A. Tame way.

 

A blonde, a redhead, and a brunette were all lost in the desert. They found a lamp and rubbed it. A genie popped out and granted them each one wish. The redhead wished to be back home. Poof! She was back home. The brunette wished to be at home with her family. Poof! She was back home with her family. The blonde said, "Awwww, I wish my friends were here."

 

A blonde went to the appliance store sale and found a bargain. "I would like to buy this TV," she told the salesman.

"Sorry, we don't sell to blondes," he replied.

The blonde was very angry about this. She hurried home and dyed her hair, then came back and again told the salesman, "I would like to buy this TV."

"Sorry, we don't sell to blondes," he replied.

The blonde did not know how the salesman had recognized her. This time, she got a haircut and new color, a new outfit and big sunglasses. She then waited a few days before she approached the salesman.

"I would like to buy this TV."

"Sorry, we don't sell to blondes," he replied.

Frustrated, she exclaimed, "How do you know I'm a blonde?"

"Because that's a microwave," he replied.

 

 

Content Management System