Super Bowl jokes

Super Bowl jokes

At a press confernce a Viking player, a Bills player, and a Packers player were eating their lunch together.  The Viking player said, "If I have meatballs for lunch again ill jump from the top of this stadium!"  The Bills player said the same about his pizza, and the Packer said the same about the peanut butter and jelly sandwiches in his lunchbox.  The next day the Viking player got meatballs and jumped to his death.  Then the Bills player got pizza and jumped to his death.  Then the Colts player got peanut butter and jelly sandwich and jumped as well.  At the funeral, the Viking and Bills wives were crying and said, "If only we had known this I wouldn’t have packed them that lunch!"  The Colts wife said, "That’s strange, my husband always packs his own lunch!

 

Q: What do you call 53 millionaires around a TV watching the Super Bowl in Arlington, Texas?

A: The Dallas Cowboys!

Q: What do you call a 350 pound Packer fan?

A: An anorexic!

Q: How does a Packer fan find a sheep in the vast rolling hills of Wisconsin?

A: Satisfying!

Q: What do you call a Packer fan with a sheep under his arm?

A: A pimp. 
Silly Super Bowl Facts & Figures

6% of Americans call in sick the Monday after Super Bowl

Antacid sales increase by 20% on the Monday following the Super Bowl

8 million pounds of guacamole is consumed on Super Bowl Sunday.

14,500 tons of chips are eaten along with that guacamole.

The average number of people at a Super Bowl party is 17.

5% of Americans will watch the game alone.

Of the top 10 most watched television programs of all time, 9 of them are Super Bowls

Super Bowl Beers & Bathrooms

Americans will spend nearly $11 billion on beer for Feb. 5.

A little more than 94 percent of that will be spent on domestic brands.

It takes 1.4 billion trips to the bathroom and over 2 billion gallons of water to flush away that almost $11 billion in beer that we’ll consume.

58 percent of viewers go to the bathroom during the game so as to not miss the commercials.

More drivers are involved in alcohol-related accidents on Super Bowl Sunday than any other day of the year (except St. Patrick's Day), according to the Insurance Information Institute

 

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