loser jokes

Funny jokes about losers


The Winner is always part of the answer; 
The Loser is always part of the problem. 


The Winner says, "It may be difficult, but it is possible";

The Loser says, "It may be possible, but it is too difficult".


Smart man + Smart woman = love

Dumb man + smart woman = fur, diamond, jewelry … etc.

Smart man + dumb woman = a crush

Dumb man + dumb woman = marriage


A successful man makes much more money than his wife can spend.

A successful woman is the one that finds such a man.

A guy had been feeling down for so long that he finally decided to seek the aid of a psychiatrist.

He went there, lay on the couch, spilled his guts then waited for the profound wisdom of the psychiatrist to make him feel better.

The psychiatrist asked me a few questions, took some notes then sat thinking in silence for a few minutes with a puzzled look on his face.

Suddenly, he looked up with an expression of delight and said, "Um, I think your problem is low self-esteem. It is very common among losers."


A small company was on the brink of bankruptcy, so the owner came up with a sales incentive program to help motivate his salesmen.

Calling his two-man sales force into his office, he announced, "Things aren't looking good and unless we increase our sales, we won't be in operation much longer. In light of this, I have come up with a a contest for you. The guy with the highest sales will receive a blow job."

"What does the loser get?" asked one of the salesmen.

"The loser," replied the owner, glaring at both men, "gets to give it!"

A woman who is tired of having a guy hit on her says, "Look ... I'm sorry, but I'm just not your type. I'm not inflatable"



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